Monday, April 11, 2011

How to deal with a stepmom

A friend of mine forwarded's funny, but unfortunately so true... The Stepkids Handbook on How to Deal with a Stepmom:

  • If a Stepmother gives her stepchildren gifts, she's trying to buy your affections.

  • If a Stepmother doesn't give her stepchildren gifts, she's cold and withholding (and cheap. Makes you wonder why she married your Dad...)

  • If a Stepmother tries to engage a stepchild in conversation, she's pushy and probing.

  • If a Stepmother backs off and does her own thing, she's cold and unwelcoming.

  • If the Stepmother's house is untidy, feel sorry for Dad for having to live in such a mess.

  • If the Stepmother's house is clean, feel sorry for Dad for having to put up with such an uptight shrew.

  • If Dad wants to see you regularly, it's just the Stepmother trying to play "happy families" and replace your Mother.

  • If Dad doesn't want to see you regularly, then the stepmother is trying to push you out of his life.

  • Stepmothers should have their own kids and stop trying to steal the first wife's children away from her by being so nice.

  • Stepmothers shouldn't have their own kids because the first kids will feel abandoned and won't get all Dad's money, time and attention.

  • If you ask Dad for money and he gives it to you, it's the stepmothers fault you had to ask in the first place. Dad should have just known, and he would have given you more than you asked for if it wasn't for her.

  • If you ask Dad for money and he says "no", it's because the stepmother is controlling the finances behind the scenes.

  • If the stepmother organizes a holiday, it's never where you want to go, or what you want to do (even if you said it was before, you are entitled to change your mind).

  • If the stepmother doesn't take you on holiday, she's just plain selfish and cheap.. and Dad would have taken you anywhere you wanted, if not for her.

  • If the stepmother asks you to dress nicely for Dad's birthday dinner, she's being controlling (so dress as badly as you like to prove to her she isn't the boss).

  • If the stepmother doesn't take you out for Dad's birthday dinner (and pay for it all.. somewhere expensive, with no thanks), she's trying to exclude you from Dad's life.

  • If the stepmother let's you disrespect her, she's trying too hard (so you can be rude because she deserves what she gets).

  • If the stepmother insists on basic respect and civility, she's a bitch.

  • If your Dad can't pay his bills, then the stepmother isn't budgeting his money properly (Dad was doing fine before she came along, even if he was sleeping on the street).

  • If your Dad sets any budget or limit on something you want, it's really the stepmother controlling him, because he'd just give you absolutely everything otherwise. If the dishes aren't done, it's the stepmothers fault.

  • If it's Dad's job to do the dishes and they aren't done, then the Dad is obviously a slave in his own home and that's the stepmothers fault. (This also goes for hedge trimming, car maintenance.. any domestic duty, really).

  • It's unfair for your Dad to have to do any chores at all. She should have to do everything, that's what she signed up for when she married a man with kids.)

  • If the stepmother treats you like an honoured guest, you don't feel like family and she shouldn't have married your Dad if she couldn't accept his family.

  • The stepmother has no right to treat you like family because she simply isn't your family and never will be. Family are expected to do stupid things like clean up after themselves, and obviously you shouldn't have to do that.

  • Any positive interaction between a stepmother and her own children is sickening and fake, if she isn't spoiling her children entirely.

  • Any negative interaction between a stepmother and her own children just goes to show what a bad mother she is.

  • Stepmothers are never sick. They just pretend to be so they get your Dad's time and attention away from you.

  • Stepmothers who hardly ever get sick are still hypochondriacs. Any illness your stepmother does contract is somehow her own fault, which entitles her to derision, never sympathy (and god forbid she get any help, especially from your Father).

  • If your stepmother lends you something of hers, she has no right to expect it back in one piece, in a reasonable time frame, or at all, really.

  • If you stepmother won't lend you something of hers, she's a selfish miserable bitch with trust issues.

  • If you take something of your stepmother's it isn't stealing. When she dies, it will all go to Dad, and when he dies, it will all go to you. As she's "dead to you" already, you might as well have her stuff now.

  • If you do steal something from your stepmother, then she has no right to complain, as your Dad should have spent that money on you, and she had too many of whatever it was anyway. Even if she only had one, from before she was married.

  • If your stepmother cooks, it's guaranteed that the food with be terrible. The better it is, the more you need to find something wrong with it.If your stepmother doesn't cook, she's a lazy bitch.

  • Anything that your Dad cooks is automatically fantastic, poor man.Just remember, everything she does is wrong, because it's all her fault. As long as you give her that much power, you'll have someone else to blame for every bad thing in your life.


  1. Sadly, this is so very true!! At least in my situation it sure is!

    Thanks for posting.

  2. ... Really dont understand the logic behind this, so ur telling me there isnt a so called nice stepmom in the world?

  3. ChengLin, there are tons of nice stepmoms out there, unfortunately this is meant more sarcastically about how no matter what you do if you are nice it can be spun in a bad way. I truly hope this isn't what my stepkids really think, but I'm sure there are TONS that do.

  4. Even tho this is sarcasm
    It shouldn't be because it so true

  5. Oh yes, it's true. Especially if Dad has a daughter.

  6. I have a step mom and well... She is good and bad.
    - Nice women to other people
    - scolds me for teaching my little step brother anything
    - She helps me occasionally.
    - Bitches a lot
    - gets into debates for everything...
    I guess not all that is true for everyone but some people. I know some people have great step moms. Mines is just... that thing...

  7. I am a step mom and a step daughter..
    this is amazing I see it from both sides. I know step children can be rude, ungrateful disrespectful. After 13 years (a step mom) & 29 years being a step daughter;
    I built what I thought was a strong foundation with my own step children. Until I decided to confront my step daughter about her choice to spend time with her mother and her moms family over her father's family.
    Well I guess to sum it up..
    its okay my husband & I are there for financial support but we don't count when its time for what really matters spending time with family. Holidays grandchildren birth etc. We always get the crumbs nit the slice. Very sad.

  8. I am sure there a millions of great Stepmoms out there and I know I have one. But that doesn't mean that they don't try to over step their boundaries sometimes. It doesn't mean that we don't love you its just we don't like it at all when Step moms make the step kids feel like their biological parents don't count no matter what reason they have they shouldn't do that. I hope for all you stepmoms out there that you understand not all Step kids think this way, it might seem like it, but maybe as the "stepmoms" you should ask them whats really bothering them, instead of posting crap on the internet.

  9. At least I know I am not unique. Company is nice to have. As a stepmom, I feel like an outsider thats good to use as a general servant.

  10. I think you're being a little over generous to the stepmother implying she's some king of self-less saint. I'm an adult now but my step mom was horrible: she used to pull me aside and ask me not to stay for Christmas, or a few months before I moved out she took all the money I got for my eighteenth birthday and used it to buy a bed for my bedroom. Seems nice since before I had a fifteen year old matress on the floor. Then however I wasn't allowed to choose the bed and it quickly transpired that I was never allowed to take the bed when I got an apartment. So they basically refused me and 18th birthday and christmas present, took all my money to furnish their spare room (proved by the fact they asked me to remove everything even artwork when I moved out- so it wasnt in a 'youll always have a home here spirit).Eurrgh. Okay not all step parents are horrible, but some really resent the ex's kids living under their roof.

  11. Some of this is true. It seems like we're being unfair. After I talk to my dad if I say something that either of them disagree with if she finds out, I feel literally like my soul is coming to peices.

  12. I have such a stepmom that is 21 years old and my dad is 35.My mom lives 2 hours away and I live with my dad and only talk or sometimes visit with my mom.My stepmom has a 8 month old baby and always expects me to take care of him(like I have been because she thinks I need to be prepared for when I get older).She is mean to me sometimes and nice mostly to everyone else.She calls everything in the house hers even if it was here before she was.She does not do any chores and makes me do them...whenever I apparently act up she takes my stuff and grounds.Of course,my dad usually does not do anything about it because he is apparently in love with her.She has cheated on my dad before in our house while she was alone and my dad let her come back after she left...even though he found a condom in his bed(that was apparently her friends).He never says anything when she talks badly about my mom and actually goes along with her.Everything she does bad he says it is because she is bipolar.Now that they are married,she thinks she has total control over me and can hit me.She has only been here for like 7 months and she still does not have a job and buys us food with food stamps(and thinks it's OK because she gets a check every month).My dad buys her anything and everything(even though she calls me selfish).My Nanna on my dad's side does not like her either.Especially since she is only about 8 years older than me.I will be 13 in 2 months.I think it is safe to say I do not like her and I might even say I "hate" her.

  13. i had stepmother when i was 5. but she isnt always at home but recently she moved back at our house. since around 2013 and that was the worst time in my life. its affect my social life, my works, and she's always messing up with me or my dad. she's always so selfish and annoying and complaining all the time. there was so many times i told my father if u dont happy then just get a divorce. but he said he had me( a daughter) and he doesnt want to set a bad example for my fhe future spouse. im 25 btw. and im thinking of never get married . Because i saw how they fight everyday and how unhappy my father is living with some super annoying woman. honestly im living in a country that still thinking bad of divorce and for me,its really not fair . well, for u, a single parents who thought about remarried. please consider of ur child. Even if u love ur future spouse so much remember that the future of ur child depends on who she/he grow up with, and i really dont want to be that kind of selfish parents as well. In my conditions, my father remarried because his mother asked him too so that he hv someone to taking care of me ( which is never happen, my father did the double job all my life, he's the one that cook for me and stay with me when i sick and so on). my father didnt love her and my stepmom didnt love him either ( she marry him because she was almost 40 at that time her parents asked her to get married asap) . i know there's thousand of great stepmother out there . but please, please think again of ur own flesh and blood, if u want to remarried. forgive my grammar btw. its not my first language :D. and hope u all a great day

  14. Oh, poor you. Boo hoo. Stepparents are just perfect flawless angels and all stepkids have nothing better to do than to obsess over them and blame them for everything. There should be a soap opera about it: "The Reverse Cinderella Effect." Poor stepmommies. Look, no one wanted you around except your husbands, so if you feel like such a pitiful victim, just break up.